The biggest Chanukah merch fails of the season — part 2
We’ve written before about Rabbi Yael Buechler, who is the Lower School rabbi and outreach coordinator at the Leffell School (until recently the Solomon Schechter School of Westchester) by day, and the rest of the time brings her Jewish creativity to such projects as Midrash Manicures and Shabbat pajamas. Recently, she has collected some of this season’s valiant yet troubled efforts to integrate Chanukah into the commercial holiday supply chains, and she has displayed them both on her Instagram channel and in this report she wrote for Kveller. In the spirit of extending the celebration, we are running the second part of her report this week.
As a rabbi and Chanukah pajama-maker, this season is the most wonderful time of the year for me. I love seeing Chanukah items pop up in store aisles, endcaps and checkout areas. The Chanukah market has grown so much these past few years, but we’ve discovered that more merch means more…mishaps (like the epic “Happy Tuchus” Sukkot treat box that kicked off this season of mistakes).
So far, I’ve been to 30 stores to peruse (and OK, judge) their Chanukah offerings (I post each visit on Instagram) and spend way too much time looking at Chanukah items online, and unfortunately, I’ve come across a lot of errors.
I definitely appreciate the efforts of brands — both large and small — to include Chanukah in their holiday collections. My immigrant ancestors would never have dreamed of dreidel pillows in the aisles of mainstream department stores or that even reptiles would be included in the Chanukah fun! Maybe by next Chanukah, more companies will, at the very least, run their Chanukah merch by someone who knows about Chanukah or basic Hebrew.
Here are three more most questionable Chanukah offerings this year. As I say at the end of my Chanukah shopping videos this season, “Thanks for trying!”
5. Happy Chanukah Wall Decor
This Chanukah Wall Decor made its way to several stores’ websites (I ordered this one from Target) and is sort of the epitome of Chanukah product fails.
WHAT WORKS: Hard to find something that works here. Dreidels and presents are good, I guess?
WHAT DOESN’T: Where to start? This should spell out “Chanukah Sameach” (Happy Chanukah) but in reality it spells out “Chakunach Chamesh.” The Hebrew letters are correct but they are in reverse letter order. We also have what looks like a genie’s lamp featured prominently (a new way to submit Chanukah wishes, perhaps?).
6. Unicorn Piggy Bank
This blue piggy bank unicorn currently (and apparently, accidentally) appears in a handful of CVS Chanukah displays.
WHAT WORKS: Love the metallic blue!
WHAT DOESN’T: Oh dear. First, pigs are not kosher animals, and the sacrifice of pigs is tied into the way that the Temple was desecrated. So, cute as they are, no piggies for Chanukah, please. On top of the “treyf” (non-kosher) factor, throughout history Jews have been negatively associated with money (during the Middle Ages, Jews were prohibited from owning land and joining craft guilds so they were more likely to be money lenders), so any association with Jewish products and money is not ideal.
7. “Chanukah” Sweatshirt
This cozy light blue Chanukah sweatshirt by Champion includes the words and clip art for menorah, dreidel, latkes, challah, sufganiyot, Torah and … matzah.
WHAT WORKS: It’s impressive that this sweatshirt includes the Hebrew word for jelly donuts — sufganiyot. Someone did their homework, but only a bit because…
WHAT DOESN’T: This sweatshirt is the overly optimistic instapot of Chanukah apparel. Let’s throw everything in and maybe it will taste delicious (even if a few of the items aren’t even food or Chanukah-related)! The “Happy Hanukkah!” should probably just say “Happy Jewish” but, honestly, why even bother?
8. *Bonus Mistake* (or the Shamash!): Happy Chanukah Pop Up Sukkah
Technically this Pop Up Sukkah is for Sukkot, but since its banner meant to say “Happy Chanukah,” I’m including it.
WHAT WORKS: Cute! Easy to assemble! Includes paper strips to make garlands!
WHAT DOESN’T: An accidental Hebrew word reversal means that this entrance banner says “Chanukah Happy” instead of “Happy Chanukah.” Also, you know, wrong holiday.
Jewish Telegraphic Agency
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