More welcomingness, please!
Temple Avodat Shalom, River Edge, Reform
In a divided world, hachnasat orchim is more important than ever.
We are between two linked holidays, Sukkot and Thanksgiving. Much of why they are so similar is because the Puritans based the latter on the former. Visually, they share autumnal themes. On a deeper level, they share the values of hakarat hatov (gratitude) and hachnasat orchim (welcoming guests). Hachnasat orchim, one of the commandments, comes from this week’s Torah portion, Vayera. But it has an importance beyond the literal fulfillment of the commandment, be it at Sukkot or Thanksgiving. Hachnasat orchim also represents an ethical value: embodying “welcomingness” in our behaviors.
In the story from this week’s parshah, hachnasat orchim is extremely concrete. Abraham and Sarah literally welcome guests. It turns out they were divine messengers; we debate to this day whether, as prophets, Abraham and Sarah knew this immediately, or if they realized it during the visit. For now, let’s assume they did not know at first, because it will better make the point I’m going for.
In the story, Abraham and Sarah set the bar high as role models for welcomingness. Many specific details of the story show them as being eager, gracious, and generous hosts. Despite the hot day, Abraham is sitting at the entrance of the tent in order to be able to see potential guests, the sages tell us. When he does see the guests, he does not walk but runs to greet them. When he greets them, he bows to them and addresses them as “my lords” and calls himself “your servant.” He offers them bread and water and the opportunity to freshen themselves up but delivers much more. Sarah bakes cakes from the finest flour, they prepare steak from the finest cuts, and they serve it with rich milk and curds. Abraham personally waits on them.
Have any of us ever gone so far out of our way to host surprise guests whom we don’t even know? Honestly, how often do we go to these lengths of hospitality for guests we do know and are expecting? The takeaway from this story is not that we should spend all day sitting on the porch, steaks at the ready, just in case a potential guest walks by. Rather, it teaches us to embody the ethos the story represents. It teaches that we should strive to emulate the character traits shown by Sarah and Abraham.
Hachnasat orchim, welcomingness, is not just literal. It is also an attitude. And as an attitude, it is also a bridge. I know I am not the only person who is looking at upcoming Thanksgiving gatherings that will present a diverse cross section of religious, political, and social values at one table. With tensions high over the state of the world, Israel, and the elections, it is more important to sit down together — not less. And a welcoming attitude can go a long way. Hachnasat orchim doesn’t ask if we have voted a certain way, or if we define Zionism in a certain way. In fact (though it would be a shock to my own Zeyda, may his memory be a blessing), you can practice hachnasat orchim at a festival table without bringing up politics at all. What hachnasat orchim does ask is that we all sit down together. That we participate in that most human activity of sharing a meal together. As Abraham and Sarah demonstrate, there is no litmus test, only a welcoming attitude.
On Sukkot it is a specific commandment. On Thanksgiving, it is baked (pun intended) into the spirit of the holiday — welcoming differences as we share a delicious meal together. Extending a bridge of hachnasat orchim across the diversity of our own Thanksgiving table is a great place to start practicing this value — but it is only a start.
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