Things You May Not Have Known About Being Jewish
Q: Why did Adam and Eve have a perfect marriage?
A: He didn’t have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn’t have to hear about the way his mother cooked.
Q: What business is a yenta in?
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A: Yours.
Q: How do Jewish wives get their children ready for supper?
A: They put them in the car.
Q: What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long?
A: Nothing at all
Q: Define “genius”
A: An average student with a Jewish mother
Q: If Tarzan and Jane were Jewish, what would Cheetah be?
A: A fur coat
Jewish Proverbs:
– The trouble with some Jewish women is that they get all excited about nothing; then they marry him.
– A Bar Mitzvah is defined as the day when a Jewish boy comes to realize that he is more likely to own a professional sports team than he is to play for one.
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