Like sands through the hourglass
Yesterday, I went to my dad’s OB/GYN office to take a pregnancy test and the nurse said to me, “It’s positive.”
Yesterday, I was in labor for 24 hours and 30 minutes, most of those without any medication, because I was determined to have a “natural” birth. Yesterday, I was singing lullabies to a bright-eyed baby boy who slept through the night and always had a smile on his face. Yesterday, I was running to Kmart to buy my 2-year-old Blue’s Clues underwear because he said he wanted to wear them and go on the potty. Yesterday, I was taking my little boy by the hand and dropping him off at nursery school. Yesterday, I was sending my boy to sleep-away camp for the first time, and I was so nauseous I had to sit down. Yesterday, I watched my boy play goalie wearing equipment that weighed more than he did. Yesterday, I took my son for his high school interview. Yesterday, I took my son to the airport to send him off for his year in Israel.
Man, yesterday was a really long day.
It must have been, because today that adorable little boy is a senior in college. I decided that since it is graduation season and I am not now mothering anyone who is graduating, I will be clichéd and reflective as my first-born begins his last year of college. And all of those other milestones really do feel like they were just yesterday. After all, I just graduated from high school, so how do I have a son who is only a year away from graduating from college? This is what happens. The sand keeps pouring through the hourglass, our lives keep marching on, hopefully in good health, and these milestone events help to put everything into perspective.
Son #1 has a wedding this weekend. The aunt of the girl who is getting married was my camper in Camp Seneca Lake in 1988. 1988. Do you remember 1988? Wasn’t that just a few years ago? Nope, it was not. It was almost 30 years ago. 30.
Last weekend, husband #1, sons #1 and #3 and I had the pleasure of spending some quality time in Brookline, Mass., with a childhood friend of husband #1. When husband #1 gets together with this friend, it is like they are transported back to Monsey in the 1970s. They tell the same stories and giggle like they are little kids again, and her husband and I roll our eyes and know which story will be coming next. It is like we are in a time machine, transported back to the time before everything you did was put on social media. Before kale became a vegetable. Before we had kids and jobs and mortgages and yeshiva tuition. Before every scary thing that happened in the world was plastered all over the place, giving young kids nightmares and their parents cause to up their medications.
You would think I might think it was weird that husband #1 has such a special relationship with this woman. But I don’t, because it is so sweet and special. And it brings out a side of him that I never see. What do I mean by that? If this friend is in town only for 15 minutes and she is spending those 15 minutes getting a manicure, husband #1 will meet her at the manicure place. A more drastic example? Well, in the almost 22 years we have been married, making early Shabbos has been an annoying staple of every week. It drives me crazy, but as gabbai of our synagogue, this is what husband #1 does. We drove to Boston and there was a ton of traffic and out of husband #1’s mouth comes, “You know what, we might have to make Shabbos at regular time. That’s OK with you, right?”
Is that OK with me? I have been asking you to do this for almost 22 years! It takes driving out to see his “special” friend for this question to be asked. Fortunately, it only took five hours to get there, and not eight, so we were still able to make early Shabbos. Phew!
But, in the end, it’s all good. Being with those people who have been in your life forever makes you feel young. It helps you reminisce about times that were filled with unadulterated joy and happiness. Because, before you know it, you turn around and your kid is starting his last year of college and you wonder where all of that time went.
Wishing all of those graduating from nursery school through graduate school much luck in all of your future endeavors. Every graduation is exciting and important!
Banji Ganchrow of Teaneck missed her 25th college reunion. Who needs to see all of those old people in person when she can just go on Facebook and see them all there?
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