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I recently was aboard an El Al flight in Economy class, heading to Israel from Rome. I had luckily bagged a pair of seats across the aisle, one for my husband and one for me. Shortly before takeoff a young charedi man, about 19 or 20 I guessed, climbed into the middle seat, next to me.
He was clearly not happy with his seat assignment. I was a woman, albeit 86, far from seductive, no doubt considerably older than his own grandmother or even great-grandmother. (I have grandchildren approaching middle age, in their upper 30s.) However unalluring I was/am, I remained a woman, and he was clearly not eager to sit next to me. My husband and I have a longstanding policy that we stick to our assigned seats on a flight unless, miraculously, we are offered an upgrade. That rarely — actually never — happens, so the young man’s attempts to dislodge us or have us change our seats to accommodate him were politely refused. I could have been really arrogant and told him to pray for a better seat, but since I too am a believer, I would not desecrate my relationship with God to spite anyone at all.
Actually I could have been nicer. I could have said, “sure, no problem” and switched seats with my husband. But I was uninclined to do so. Aren’t kol Yisrael chaverim? What would have been the big deal?
There was one major reason that I felt the redemptive value of not moving across the aisle. It’s called the IDF, the Israel Defense Forces. This young man, in his traditional Eastern European 19th-century garb, belonged to a sect that almost in its entirety refuses service in the IDF. Due to the need to form coalitions during Israeli elections, it is impressively difficult to form a government without charedi support. The bargain for any government in formation is to feed the charedim what they want, endless funding for their institutions and a free pass on serving in the military, meaning most of their healthy young men spend their days in yeshivot.
This seat assignment business would belie his faith that prayer wins wars. If he could not win his little battle with an old lady on an airplane, how could his prayers win wars or release hostages? Clearly they could not!
I am the grandmother of two soldiers who have served Israel nobly, willingly, bravely, and with utter devotion to their faith and their nationality. They both attended yeshivot in addition to secular universities and rigorously observe the mitzvot. I am incredibly proud of both of them, who showed courage and conviction in places like wartime Gaza and Lebanon. Our extended family also includes numerous other members of the IDF, both historically and presently.
I am deeply embarrassed by those of our people who refuse to honor the call of Israel‘s draft, citing any number of feeble excuses to explain away their cowardice. They are reminders of Donald Trump, another notable draft dodger who repeatedly avoided the American military with specious and misleading claims. Perhaps he had no sore feet but surely he is a sore loser.
To me those charedim who vigilantly march, cause massive traffic jams, and demonstrate by the thousands to evade the draft are a huge disgrace to our people. They breed animosity and distrust. They are takers, not givers, receiving Israeli government doles in every aspect of their lives. Many of them live in poverty, unwilling to become secularly educated and unable to secure decent jobs or housing. Their yeshivas do not provide adequate studies in mathematics, language, the sciences, or contemporary culture. They are anomalies in our contemporary lives. And they are a time bomb in our Jewish enclaves in America and in our nation of Israel.
What, for example, will Israel do in the next few decades when the charedi numbers overwhelmingly increase due to their extraordinarily high birth rate? Who will defend the country? Will prayer alone suffice? The answer came from Yitzchak Rabin himself, who declared that Israel had won wars because of the sacrifice of its soldiers rather than divine intervention. Most assuredly, divine intervention may have provided strength and morality to the numerous battles that have, and continue to, challenge Israel, but this has certainly been bolstered enormously by the efforts of its military. Do any of us wish to test that concept? Having personally been in Israel for the Yom Kippur War and for other skirmishes and for part of the most recent war with Iran, and for seeing our children and grandchildren and great-grandchildren endure miklats and sirens and pervasive danger, I want to pray to God as an act of faith, supported by advanced military training. I’m guessing that you feel the same!
And it’s hard to be forgiving and tolerant when those non-charedim already serving and postponing huge chunks of their lives are forced to give even more of their precious time with additional service and further delays to their university studies to compensate for those who will not be called upon — ever.
If the present government continues to yield the same unreasonable level of obeisance to the charedi political parties, there is little hope for continuing victories in war or the future of the country. Moderate Israelis will leave the land, seeing no future for their children and no chance to live in peace. How profoundly devastating that would be for all of us who love Israel and wear the banner of Zionism with immense pride!
As to my seatmate — I did not change seats with my husband to enable the young man to avoid being close to me. The absolute truth is that as soon as the seatbelt sign went off, he went to the back of the plane. I have no knowledge as to what he did for landing or other seatbelt signs. He never reappeared, and I flew with two seats to myself.
Rosanne Skopp of West Orange is a wife, mother of four, grandmother of 14, and great-grandmother of 12. She is a graduate of Rutgers University and a dual citizen of the United States and Israel. She is a lifelong blogger, writing blogs before anyone knew what a blog was! She welcomes email at rosanne.skopp@gmail.com